I Bottomed Out but I Rejected Negativity. Would Patience and Gratitude Work?
At our lowest points we need a different word for low. Every single thing that I had valued in my heart, physical and emotional, had been completely zeroed out from my heart. It had been wiped clean. I had lost my husband and I was about to be evicted from my home, widowed with no place to go. I was not well and couldn’t work at the time, so I had no income and no prospects.
I knew about manifesting with vision boards and lists, but I didn’t have the energy to do anything except sit on the porch and continue to know it would be OK. Whatever had brought me to this point would get me to the next place and that it would be special. I absolutely knew in the depths of me that something would happen but I had no idea of the what or how, but I knew I would be OK. I would allow help and not succumb to negativity.
The next day, that’s right, the next day, a friend that I had not heard from in several years called me. I was shocked to hear from her. She said, “I’m so happy to find you. Are you still doing artwork?” I was glazed and confused but I managed to say, “Oh yeah, of course I am.” She told me she had massive water damage in her home recently. She told me that the whole lower part of her house and many of the commissioned artworks I had completed years before were damaged. She asked if I would come up tomorrow and take a look at everything.
Arriving the next day, I caught her up on my difficulties and she asked, “So where are you going to go?” I said, “I have no idea,” and she told me I could stay with her. This a mega, multimillion-dollar home with I don’t even know how many square feet. Every inch is immaculately designed and beautiful, a paradise.
At the time, my soul was stripped down but I had just been offered a glorious place to live that was full of the art that I loved and we created together 15 years before. There were murals on the walls, ceilings and works on canvas from a peak creative time. It would be like a homecoming, so I said yes to her kind offer! I would have a safe place to stay. I had been rescued by an angel.
The owner outlined a lot of work for me to do, repairing my wall murals and making new ones. It was going to take months and she wanted me to stay in her home the entire time while I worked on all of those projects.
She provided home, shelter and food for me. She would ask me if I would do small errands for her like going to the grocery so I didn’t have the chance to completely collapse in on myself.
In October of that year, I got a call informing me that my daughter was in hospice and that I was needed in North Carolina. My daughter had been sick off and on for over a decade but in the last year she had been critically sick. This was going to be hard for us after all the times she had rallied before and carried on. Three very dear friends saw to it that I had an airplane ticket and within three days I was there in hospice with her. She passed a few weeks later, leaving me unmoored once again.
I flew back to the same environment that thankfully offered me unconditional space to grieve, to work on the art projects, or whatever I needed to do at the time. There were always small things to keep me busy and to keep my mind going. Because of her understanding and grace, I wasn’t on a deadline, I was completely cared for and allowed to heal.
Sometime later, I made the acquaintance of someone that helped to bring me out of my depths. It was like what happens to a drowning person that is given CPR and on their revival, they take that first breath, choosing to live.
I began to do artworks for a gallery and larger mural commissions started coming in. I realized that earlier, I couldn’t visualize a future or ask or pray for solutions. Before, I didn’t have the ability to conceptualize anything, but not anymore. I began to imagine that I could find my next place to live and be able to support myself. All of that came to pass as well, but that’s another story!
Throughout all of this, I kept going back to what it is that created me. The power that innately holds the cells in my body together, Source. It’s my feeling that I am one with source or God but it is God that does the work. My role is to do my best, reject negativity and be continually open and grateful.
When I was in need, synchronicity kicked in at an extraordinary pace. My needs were food, shelter, compassion and a way to support myself. It was always provided, sometimes in the most amazing ways. I was always excepting it to be so and no matter what, I was always grateful. Grateful, grateful, grateful!
Go to the Interviews Page to see and hear Ken talking about Manifesting 123 and you don’t need #3. There is new information here and you won’t hear it anywhere else. It is so simple. Make it work for you!
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